Nick Mancuso - Germany - Oedipus L.A.


	OEDIPUS L.A.
	( by Nick Mancuso )

		Thebes spent westward travelling towards the blinding sun choking from the dust of foottraffic ox and cart, towards the closing gates, it makes no difference to me o Thebes, sunwhipped city, purpleshadowed filled with the smell of nectarine & loquat of lily of the valley and blue-hued iris eyed and perfumed I Oedipus am a blood flower sightless, eyeless, beyond all lonliness o Thebes, sun-whipped city, away away from your ivory walls, your cyprus cloying to the sense towards a stony road lead me o lead me stones away hurry towards my sudden turned out heart withered, dried as the hottest month of summer towards the parched hillocks away from this maddest of cities, it was not I caused your ruination, your doom it is sealed now, I, following the scent the tinkling and the bleating of your goats lead me to the rivers that into the rivers run far towards the ancient sea and this angry land, towards that river away I shall be turned to stone soon it’s alright to be caught in the glare of your sudden light I hear the people murmer on both sides saying look! it’s him! Oedipus the king! him! look! whispers in the lemon scented wind....... o Jocasta! mother-wife oh Jocasta! mother! wife! oh daughter-sister I shall be turned to stone soon look! lamp in hand, caughtin the fierce gaze of your blinding light I have no need for eyes now though it is night now and everywhere eyes eyes! eyes! I was old before I was young, destroyer to that which created me, now destroyed a murderer of kings now a living murdered king lost among the clouded colonnades a white bird that follows me (for I can hear the beating of his wings) at night when the cool of my pleasing what music shade stops me and I rub my feet I feel embarassed to say a clock is whispering in my chest I ask what music is this that leads me that I hear like a shephards pipe I ask who is it call me by name Oedipus, sweet Oedipus, Oedipus I remember you o now eternal sphynx, lucky to be turned to gelatinous stone for it was I arrogant Oedipus that froze you where is your harsh discordant voice calling me now demanding insistent your ether-empty eyes staring straight ahead you were the horizon incarnate you were my first love do you hear? it was rage that made me slaughter infinity creature, man and not you Chimera fear that made me answer thus made me proud and arrogant dressed in rags a poor sap with a cloak that would not close, it was winter made me approach those men not evil they thought in their foolishness I had come to rob them for there were thieves in those hills but I was merely hungry and cold a poor beggar not a thief and certainly not a murderer and yet I murdered out of rage I didn’t even have a sword why did you not stop me you had wings? why not? why did you not stop me? & when I waddled out in blood glistening newborn covered from head to toe, shining new and howled my birth rage among all that slaughtered death I howled my rage till the wolves came and the vultures too and picked their flesh and bones I did not hate those men but I could not bring myself to bury them for three days I sat and watched. why could you not have called me out? breasted angel, childless, lioness of the desert I loved you then and loved the desert too and the answer that I gave you that of man, why any desert fool could have said the same and just the same that all I was, was a snotnosed child, scared to death who wished to suck the teat. you saw me frozen in that desert wind and when you saw me turned to endless stone. Two o reason bleeding from the brain it was you reason that led me to this point voluntarily led me to this point and then astounded me it was you Sphynx! with your queroulous voice, strident, musical a voice of many voices that held me, you knew the answer to the answer I should have murdered you it was the stake of fear you held against Oedipus heavy hearted and turned my hair white (just the dust of the secret desert) o Sphynx, how I loved you then! father. father. father. who was it that was left? it was rage that made me slaughter (I didn’t have a sword) and murdered all of you and when I finished with them all and saw you the gristly one who died voluntarily who did so voluntarily I waddled out all bathed in blood and howled my rage, then then I thought I heard the beating of strange wings why would you have called me out? I who was left to live and not to die in that strange paradise of the night it was the first time I saw the stars and held my baby hands out to eat them like hot sweets it was I Oedipus, odious among all men that was left to live and not to die, given the whip and the embrance of chain, not the dear caress of mother and of mothers milk the loving sound of paternal affection no, the all night calling out to you Jocasta for your mothers milk and not the venal juice. who would have buried me in that secret hour my thoat ripped out on that barren hill you snuck away the two of you, from the awful sight and snuck away like thieves did you make love that night or did you weep beneath the blankets as you heard the howling. song of bird I follow you I can not see but I can hear the crow that follows me there are no harpies just a rocky road lined by stinging nettles, and skull bleached blinding rock. I, Oedipus, now in endless flight brought water to your drought irrigated the city, could see as far as to the purple shadows of the mountains there were there vineyards now and fig, olive and sweetsmelling saffron opened up the trade routes to the north and east, towards Egypt and far beyond you exchanged and prospered but now o Thebes you line the streets with whispered gossip and ill intent! I have always left by night who would have buried me in that secret hour? circle torn by the idiot noise of gossiping men, I cuckholded myself their king is twice dead and now I ask who is it shall relace me? who is that will come to replace me what child of montrous Sphynx? you who condemned me in your midst asking “who is the foreigner come to live amongst us?” condemned me with your envious eyes a stranger among you now closer than you knew was I blood of your blood sinew of yours too.... lead me oh lead me loud stones away! from this place, from Thebes for I can hear the stirring of her wings at night a father and a son brother to myself, I Oedipus, who was a king now fallen from his stay here by sorrows foot, that I leave behind my tears are endless I could bath the world and my vision reduced to ash a single point of light that call me out not one has the right to point a finger and to say he was a bad king who didn’t care the blight was lifted the curse transformed all else had failed the people in his need, I loved Jocasta more than I knew the circle turns and returns to point the wheel that interlock the evening air turn and spin beyond the city gates I hear the hum of the road where other men sighless upon the spinning wheels move through space like rays of light a time will come when all such men mouthless, eyeless will navigate the earth... I go Thebes I Oedipus, the mountains to my back have called their longing the sea and a sweet embrace, their desire is sent to hillock valley and the stretching plains and the earth rumbles with earth worms again cracked and bleeding love seeps everywhere and as I sleep and walk I put forth sudden root!